After giving birth I couldn't wait to get back on the mat. The doctor gave me his ok after 6 weeks and back I was.
So the kid was 6 weeks old. I calculated every single second so I don't loose any time. I really thought to myself that getting perfectly organized will be the secret to success. I can manage both - newborn, my life changing and getting right back where I left off my yoga practice.
I got dressed from home so I don't waste a second. I changed the kid, prepared the bottle, fed the baby, burped the baby, put baby to sleep. Got into my car and got there just in time.
After 9 months in bed and giving birth it felt wierd. My body didn't feel like mine anymore. I had soreness everywhere and the extra weight made it so hard. And I was fighting so hard not to fall asleep on the mat. All I wanted was one hour of continuous sleep. But I was keeping in mind how much my body needs to realign. So I worked hard, focused and practiced with my entire beeing.
Because I was so perfectly organizes I was the first one to leave and head home. Got home, parked, got out of the car and realised I had milk stains all over my clothes my shoes and my wallet. Everything was covered in milk. My pants were white, my t-shirt the same... There was milk everywhere. I was such a disaster! I felt my cheeks getting red and just plain embarrassment. OK...never showing my face there again.
Oh dear God! That moment I realised that things are no longer simple. It is no longer just about beeing willing to show up for yourself and get into what must be done. Which already took so much energy and effort. It is no longer about efficiency and getting organised.
It is simply about adaptability and being able to laugh when things get funky. And acceptance. A whole lot of acceptance! And after you do all of that accepting...you discover new layers and new dimensions that need acceptance!
Always, always live and practice with with in mind.
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